Farewell Dear Friends

Finally, it's time to say goodbye. After a month of working, it's time to end the holidays and start kicking back in Shah Alam. Can't believe my one month holiday this time is filled with thousands of stories and experiences with my students, friends and boss. I finally know what people mean when they say 'work becomes play'. After this new experience, I began to rethink about my future plans. Do I really wanna be a lecturer and teach young adults or go for being a teacher and teach children? I can't believe I'm actually facing this kind of confusion before I even grad. Anyway, let's look of some of my pictures on my last day at work ya?

We are Kumon teachers! =)

My fellow co-workers

My friends are all older than me. Only Sara is a student like me. And we're both from UiTM Shah Alam! The others are all adults with a permanent job and they all work part time in Kumon. I remember watching 'Kaho Naa Pyar Hai' when I was young. There was a line in the movie that caught my attention. 'A man works during the day to feed his stomach but he works at night to fulfill his heart's desire'. In the movie, Hrithik Roshan worked as a salesman during office hours. At night, he would sing at any bar. So singing was his passion and when he sings at night it wasn't much about the money but about doing what he loves. He feels complete when he can sing and perform to an audience.

Now, before this that message was just a message to me. But after working in Kumon I finally understand what it means. My friends, they all have a stable job but why do they work part time in Kumon? It's not really about money. It's the satisfaction and joy of teaching the students. Izzudin for example. He lives In Cheras and works in HUKM. Can you believe that although Cheras & Subang Jaya is not that near, he actually took the effort to come and work part time in Kumon. Working 8 hours per day is tiring enough, and he actually continued another five hours at Kumon. He once told me that, ''working at Kumon is like my panadol. I got headache from working at HUKM and coming to Kumon is my drug''. 

As for me, I love working at Kumon because of four factors. The work, my students, my friends and my lovely boss. I enjoy teaching my students Math and English, marking their papers and educate them when I can. Because of my position as a teacher, I have come across many experiences of which I never would have expected happen to me. For example, handling a hyper student, teaching an autistic student, bringing them to the toilet (you know what happens next) and also facing a few rude students of which I do not know how to handle. Well, I think I made it sound tiring but actually it's not. It's a breathe of new air for me. It's really new to me and yet I'm loving the experience.

My second reason, the students. Looking at innocent faces every day makes you remember how beautiful life is. When you look at those young kids studying hard you just can't help feeling touched and it gives you more motivation to work. I used to think that I do not want to have a child because my child would be born in a very scary world and I do not want my child to be corrupted from it. But when I look at those innocent faces in class, I feel like there's no need to be afraid of the world. We can educate these kids to be a human. As long as they are in the right path they will turn out to be a splendid person. I just love seeing my students. The pre-schoolers are very cute and polite. The primary kids are also cute and hardworking while the secondary kids reminded me of my school days. It's a pleasure teaching them, especially since they themselves want to learn.

Another thing that I look forward to is to meet my friends. We've become close since the closing party for the kids and ever since we just couldn't stop being together. Constant plan to go out but only one succeeded. Never-ending comments and topics to share at our beloved secret group in Facebook and also the text messages when we aren't on the Internet. Planning to do this and that but it's kinda hard since we each have our own commitments besides working at Kumon. Anyway, every day I can't wait for it to be 6.00p.m when I can finally meet them. We'll always be laughing when we meet because of the topics that we talked about in our group. Well, teasing here and there and lots of gossiping sure makes you laugh and smile a lot. 

Last but not the least, is my beloved boss. I think I'm one of the luckiest person on Earth to get a boss like her. She's very close with us. She treats us like her younger sister and she's really understanding and loving. I got close with her since my first week of working. There was one day when I did not come to work cause I have to go back to my hometown. Even though I was only away for a day, we both missed each other. She was like a mom to me and she treated me as her sister. We spent lots of time together going here and there and sharing about life. I really respect her because she has gone through a lot of pain in order to become as successful as she is now. Our centre is top five in Malaysia because of her excellent performance as an instructor. Despite all her achievements, she is really down to earth and never brags about what she has.

So, I guess you can understand why I love working at Kumon so much. It's because I love evrything. There are so many things that I would like to share about kumon so you can expect more posts about kumon in the future. As for now, I'll end this post with a picture of me and my friends.

I'm thankful that I was given this opportunity. I've met new friends whom I respect very much and students who are very hardworking and naughty at times. Alhamdulillah..I have find another meaningful thing to do in life. =)  

Hello Teacher!

Finally, after all the attempts of applying for a part time job, I found one that was perfect for me! Being a teacher!!^^ I've wanted to work since after SPM but one after another thing came and stopped me from working. Well, we can only plan, Allah determines whether we get it or not. I've applied for a job in book stores, clinic, MPH and even Parkson. Each has its own problem that stopped me from getting a job. Now, after planning since last semester I managed to grab one. Yeay~! 

selamat pagi cikgu!  

Today I am even happier that my best friend got the same job too! Yeay~!!! How cool is that? We're working at the same place, but different branch. Haha!! I've been suggesting to her to work there as well cause it'll be very convenient and flexible. The working hour is not too long and the work is fun! She applied and alhamdulillah she got it too..

 

We're working at Kumon as English and Math teacher! I never knew much about Kumon until I've decided to work there. The students that come vary from age 3 to 17! I've marked an additional Mathematics paper as well. It was...err...funny may I say? Haha! I've been running away from math like since forever and here I am, marking Add m3 ok! If it's m3 it's still manageable. But it's add m3. Made me feel so impressed how the students were able to get it right within a short period of time. Genius ke hape diorg ni?

Anyway, I'm really thankful and happy to be given this chance. I've taught a special kid as well. She was slightly deaf and used a hearing aid. I never ever taught in my whole life I would ever have such experience. I was really touched that although she was special, she was learning what kids at her age are learning. And honestly she was doing fine. The fact that she's one of the hearing-impaired people did not stop her from learning. It made me wonder why fortunate people like us couldn't appreciate what we have and strive for the best. I see people taking their studies for granted and become so carefree about their life. I hope one day they'd realise how much they've lost. Well, it was a wake-up call for me as well. Some people have to go an extra mile to study so while I have the chance, I gotta go as high as I can go. I know that there are more to life than just books but hey, if you can score an A why go for B aite? So let's make a new resolution for next semester. We'll work hard to get 4.0! If we don't get it, we won't dwell but we'll try again untill we get it. Join me? Jom~! 

Nodame Cantabille

I'd like to say tenkiu so much to 21 for making me cross out one of the list of anime that I wanna watch. Alhamdulillah I finished watching Nodame Cantabile in just a few days.  Before this I only managed to watch bits and pieces of it at Animax. Now I've finished watching it from A to Z. Yeay~! I LOVE it so damn much!! >.<

the sugar and spice of the anime

I don't know much about music but I've read a comment from someone who does study music. She said that she can recognise when they are not playing it right and also when they are doing it superbly. What good ears huh? I cudn't recognise any! =p I also read somewhere that they actually really play the instruments for the anime. That's where the cost of the anime goes. It doesn't go much at the anime. They only use pastel colours for the anime.

Anyway, Nodame Cantabile is about pursuing your dreams. Chiaki is a piano major student but dreams to be a conductor. Due to his past experience in plane crash, he has a phobia and can no longer ride in a plane nor a ship. His dreams seemed impossible to be achieved since he could not go out of Japan. Music started from Europe (as they say but I heard it actually started from German) and so in order to be someone they have to bring their name there, internationally. However, Chiaki is very talented. Although he is a piano major, he can conduct an orchestra. 

The heroine of the story, Noda Megumi or known as Nodame is a junior of Chiaki. She lives next door from Chiaki's apartment and is also a piano major student. Nodame fell in love with Chiaki from the first moment they met but Chiaki, on the other hand could not stand with Nodame. However, despite hating the fact that he had to play piano with Nodame, he was very impressed with Nodame's skill in playing piano. Nodame doesn't read music notes. She listens to it and practice using her fingers. Then, she'll play at the piano. Although she only heard the song once, she can play the whole song back without even practicing. Funny thing is, Nodame is not very hygiene. Let's look at her room eh?

See how bad it is? Hehe... Chiaki took the effort to clean the apartment and in just 3 days it became like that again. Haha!! Who would ever want a girl like that? And how could someone ever live in that condition? I wonder... So you can guess aite how irritated Chiaki is with Nodame. He even has to cook for her every night. I was puzzled really to why Chiaki did all that and I only got the answer at the final episode. How sweet! ^^

I can't stop laughing watching those two. Chiaki is so cool and charismatic while Nodame is so clown-like and clumsy. I guess that's why they're attached. Chiaki completes Nodame. She's the first girl ever that he cooked for and let her hug him while walking. She was a pain in Chiaki's ass but he just can't do anything cause even when he pushed her away, hit her and everything, she doesn't get tired. Haha!!

Well, one thing for sure there is one obvious thing that connects them both. It's piano and music.

When they combine and play a piano duet, the song will be magnificent. Seriously, to those who are in love with music, you watch this anime! I got a lot of new information while watching the anime. You should see how much effort they put in doing this anime. It's a perfect anime for someone who's studying music.

As for me, I'm very surprised with the ending of the story. To me it was unexpected. And I love it. =) Hey, guess what? I know this anime was out like years ago. (in 2007 if I'm not mistaken) but I dunno the second season is out! LOL! I gotta download the second season. If I have the time, that is. K-ON was th first anime that I download on my own and I'm very happy with the effort. Maybe I'll download this in return of 21's kindness. Huhu~

2010 Mnet Asian Music Awards

As I've stated in my fb status, I'm very happy with this year's award. Well I've always been happy with the results but this year is different cause I've started to follow 2ne1 as well. Here are the list of winners, taken from allkpop.com

Daesang Award (Grand Prize)

▲ Song of the Year

2AM – “Won’t Let You Go Even If I Die”
2NE1 – “Can’t Nobody”
2PM – “I’ll Be Back”
DJ Doc – “I’m This Kind of Person”
miss A – “Bad Girl Good Girl”

▲ Album of the Year

2AM – Won’t Let You Go Even If I Die
2NE1 – To Anyone
BoA – Hurricane Venus
Super Junior – BONAMANA
Taeyang – SOLAR

▲ Artist of the Year

2AM
2NE1
2PM
miss A
SNSD

- – -

Singer Category

▲ Best New Male Artist Award (not shown during broadcast)

CNBlue
Infinite
Teen Top
Seo In Kook
ZE:A

▲ Best New Female Artist Award

G.NA
miss A
Nine Muses
Rainbow
SISTAR

▲ Male Group Award

2AM
2PM
B2ST
MBLAQ
Super Junior

▲ Female Group Award

2NE1
4minute
KARA
T-ara
SNSD

▲ Male Singer Award

PSY
Se7en
Rain
Taeyang
Wheesung

▲ Female Singer Award (not shown during broadcast)

BoA
Gummy
Seo In Young
Son Dambi
Lee Hyori

- – -

Genre Category

▲ Best Dance Performance – Solo

Narsha – “Bbiri Bbabba”
Rain – “Love Song”
Lee Hyori – “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang”
Taeyang – “I’ll be There”
Hyuna – “Change”

▲ Best Dance Performance – Male Group

2PM – “I’ll Be Back”

B2ST – “SHOCK”
MBLAQ – “Y”
SHINee – “Lucifer”
Super Junior – “Bonamana”

▲ Best Dance Performance – Female Group

2NE1 – “Can’t Nobody”
4minute – “HUH!”
miss A – “Bad Girl Good Girl”
Secret – “Magic”
T-ara – “Bo Peep Bo Peep”

▲ Best Vocal Performance – Solo

K. Will – “Miss Miss Miss”
Gummy – “Because You’re A Man”
Seo In Young – “You Write It As Love and Call It Pain”
Jung In – “Hate”
Wheesung – “I Thought of Marriage”

▲ Best Vocal Performance – Group (not shown during broadcast)

2AM – “Can’t Send You Even if I Die”
4men – “Can’t”
8Eight – “Break Up Is Coming”
Vibe – “Come Back”
Davichi – “Time Please Stop”

▲ Best Band Performance

CNBlue – “Love”
FT Island – “Love Love Love”
Hot Potato – “Confession”
Boohwal – “Love Is”
TransFixion – “The Shouts of Reds”

▲ Best Rap Performance

DJ Doc – “I’m This Kind of Person”
Epik High – “Run”
Outsider – “Acquaintance”
UV – “Sorry I’m Not Cool”
Supreme Team – “Dang Dang Dang”

▲ Best Collaboration (not shown during broadcast)

Homme – “Eating Well”
Ga-In/Jo Kwon – “We Fell In Love”
Seo Young Eun/Jung Yeob – “This Pitiful Word”
IU/Seulong – “Nagging”
Sung Shi Kyung/IU – “It’s You”

▲ Best Digital Single
MC Mong – “Hurt to Death”
Monday Kiz – “Spread Away”
Park Bom – “You and I”
Supreme Team – “Then Then THen”
Jung Yeob – “Without You”

- – -

Music Video

▲ Best Music Video
2NE1 – “Can’t Nobody”
Epik High – “Run”
UV – “Sorry I Can’t Be Cool”
Ga-In – “Irreversible”
Taeyang – “I’ll Be There”

- – -

Others

▲ Best International Artist

- Far East Movement

▲ Best Asian Pop Artist

- Perfume

▲ Best Asian Male Group

- Chemistry

▲ Best Asian Artist

- Zhang Jie

▲ Best Asia New Artist 

- iMe

▲ Producer Award (not shown during broadcast)

- PSY (for Seo In Young’s Cinderella)

▲ Music Video Director Award (not shown during broadcast)

- Seo Hyun Seung(2NE1’s “Can’t Nobody” and “Clap Your Hands”)

▲ Choregraphy Award (not shown during broadcast)

- Kim Hwa Young (JYPE)

▲ Stylist Award (not shown during broadcast)

- Yang Seung Ho (2NE1)

 ▲ Performance Award (not shown during broadcast)

- 2010 Jisan Valley Rock Festival

▲ This year’s Discovery Award (not shown during broadcast)

- 10cm

▲ Adult Music Award (not shown during broadcast)

- Tae Jin Ah

▲ The Shilla Duty Free Asian Wave Award

2PM
4minute
CNBlue
KARA
SNSD

Congratulations to all the winners.. I've been reading the comments for the result and as expected some girl group fans complain and said that some other girl group should have won. Well, no use arguing with them. If that girl group is the best for you, then they are the winner in your hearts aite? So what's the big deal? As for me...I've always supported JYP and YG so I'm very happy that they conquer most of the awards. I'm so proud to see Wonder Girls perform. Believe me, it was totally awesome! You should check it out at YouTube. Ok folks gotta go. Am gonna dream of attending the award tonight. ZzZ.... 

Interview tomorrow

I have an interview with kumon tomorrow. I hope everything turns out well and I will be able to start work next week. I still have two documents to prepare though. I haven't printed my resume, and I haven't photocopied my identity card. Insya Allah I'll be able to do it before the interview tomorrow. The interview's at 3.30pm. Right now...I'm feeling a little nervous. Hehe.. 

Just now was even worse. I totally lost my mood because of the two unsettled documents. I could've already have my resume printed if it weren't for the internet problem. If I'd email the resume to my sister she could have printed the document for me. Oh well, what to do.. I'll have to do it tomorrow then.

I've been browsing kumon's website to prepare for the interview. I can't come empty-handed and without knowing anything bout kumon aite? So I read their articles. It's interesting to know the history of kumon. My mom sort of regretted that she didn't send me there when I was in primary school. o.O and I was like, "I already have 2 tutions to go..If you made me go to kumon I dunno how I'd turn out. Huhu~" Anyway, there's nothing to regret. I just hope I'd pass the interview and be able to work with them. If I get the job, I'll be teaching twice a week! Wee~that's a good practicte for me before next sem. We have methodology already  next sem. Which means there'll be macro-teaching in class.

Uguu~before I lost my holiday mood I think I'd better stop. Wish me luck ya peeps? Wanna go have my dinner now. Adios~ ^^

Which are you?

After living life for 19 years, I come to realise that people can be grouped into a few categories. They are the loners, family-oriented, boyfriend-oriented and friend-oriented. I first realised this when I was in form three. I had a senior who was a family-oriented kind of person and because of that she was not much affected by her friends. It was kinda obvious that to her friends are just part of life, but not everything in life. So here are the few categories that I've known. Let's see if you fit into one of the categories yeah?

The lone rangers.

Lone rangers are the ones that are not friend-oriented or boyfriend-oriented. They may be family-oriented but it will be hard for people to notice because they rarely communicate with their friends. Lone rangers prefer to eat alone, go to the mall alone and are not dependent on people. You can always recognize them easily because they will always be alone. In fact, if they are walking with someone you'd feel shocked! Haha. If you interview a lone ranger, they will all give the same answer: They don't mind being alone. I do not know how lone rangers can survive because I am friend-oriented and I can never survive being alone. Ok, next are the family-oriented ones.

Family-oriented person.

You are a family-oriented person if family means everything to you. Everyone seems to claim that family meant everything to them but it is not portrayed on their behaviour and way of thinking. You see, those who are family-oriented can't lie that they are one. You can sense this kind of person by just observing. They way the make their decisions, they way they think and they way they react will all tell. Sometimes they don't even realise that it was very obvious that they are family-oriented. One striking evidence of a family-oriented person is they tend to feel sad/happy because of their family. Usually family-oriented person can survive without friends because they do not appreciate friends as much as they appreciate their family. 

Boyfriend-oriented person.

This category is very common among girls. This is another kind of person that is easy to recognise. Usually bf-oriented person will spend almost 24 hours with their bf. And I mean literally. They will be actively texting their bf if their bf is not with them. If not, their bf will always be with them. Anywhere this person goes, she will either be with her bf literally or she will be texting or calling their bf. When this kind of person have problems with their bf, their life will be a wreck. They will be like a kid who just lost their mother. One good criteria about this kind of person is they are very committed to relationships. Next we'll see how a friend-oriented person is.

 

Friend-oriented person.

Friend-oriented kind of person will be very much affected by friends. Life will be miserable for them if they have problems with their friends. Not necessarily all friend-oriented person will have lots of friends. Sometimes they only have one best friend and they will stick to that friend all the time. Usually friend-oriented kind of person will put friends as their number one priority in life. Family will come second because they are not so close with their family.

 

okay...so those are the descriptions. Can you recognise which are you? There's one thing that I would like to highlight. There is no one better category than the other. I'm not saying that you are bad if you are bf oriented. Or you are lame if you are a lone ranger. No. Everyone has their own qualities in them. Why we are oriented in such a way has much to do with our upbringing and environment. We become who we are today because of several reasons, not merely we are born that way. However, there is one category that if you fall into it, I totally respect you. The balanced person.

Balanced person will put family, friends and bf at the same priority. If not the same, at least they know how to balance between the three. They do not show any tendency that their bf is more important or that they cannot live without their friends. They are very balanced and they spend time with all three categories equally. I have friends from all the categories, including the balanced kind of person. It is impressive how a person can be very balanced. Like me, I am totally not a balanced person because I am friend and family oriented. I have not perceived a bf as one of the most important person in my life. Maybe it's bcause I'm used to be surrounded by friends rather than bf. Well, people can change. All I know is today I may be this kind of person. Who knows in the future I might be bf-oriented? Not that I ask for it, obviously. I want to be a balanced person. Think I can do it? Maybe. Who knows? ^_~

 

Contest Mimik Muka Menarik

This contest was organized by cik cikin. I knew about this competition from my cousin, Syaza. Actually she tagged me after entering the competition. So yeah, I'm interested. To be honest, I've lost a lot of my pictures. Especially the ones with expression. But I managed to find a few pictures of me and my cousin. What I see from the pictures are genuine warmth and love. I can be myself when I'm with her and vice versa. So these pictures shows our joy of being together and how much we love cam-whoring. I'm sure many other contestants would display a much better picture but I'll go for what I have now. Anyway, here's our picture together:

You guys can join the competition too! As for me, I'd like to tag these people to join the competition. Muaha3x~

*seyha*21anis*ainatul*wanie*mon2nom2*amri*

tarikh tutup : 25 DISEMBER 2010

1st Award

Alhamdulillah.. This is the first time I'm receivimg an award as a blogger. Thanx a lot to Syaza for giving me the honour of getting the award.

Weird thing is, after getting the award I have to describe 7 things about myself. Haha, baiklah..

1. I'm very into k-pop but I dislike hearing it at our local radio. Hey, our own songs couldn't get through the radio. Why tune up someone else's?

2. I love anime and was once given the tittle otaku. Though I gotta admit, there's not much that I know bout manga world actually. sob sob.

3. I support Malaysian film. But not films like 2 Alam keyh? I do not feel lame watching Malay movies at the cinema coz I support our film industry. Yeay!

4. I miss hearing nasheed songs like the ones during 'Raihan' time. The slow, soothing music and deep lyric. Well, Maher Zain is great but he's international. I miss hearing nasheed from our locals. Don't really like the contemporary type of nasheed. It spoils the beauty of it.

5. I am currently very in-to Virtual Families. (4 profiles!) Very addicted to it but not up to the point that I keep thinking bout it. 

6. Ooh I love watching theaters! Used to love working in a drama production but recently I lost the passion. Huhu. There'll always be a real drama in a drama.

7. I'm a karaoke freak. Haha, that's just an exaggeration. I karaoke to lessen my stress. Love it and luckily my family and friends love it too!

So, the conclusion is I only share the parts of myself under entertainment tab. Haha!! Well, no probs if you wanna know more about me you can just ask me directly. Or you can just keep reading my blog. Somehow it'll show. Right? Okay..Thanks again to Syaza for giving me this award. 

I'd like to dedicate the award to these people:

1. Seyha

2. 21 anis

3. Ainatul

4. Wanie

Feeling Hungry?

I'm dedicating all these biscuits 2 my beloved friends. May your lives be as sweet and beautiful as they are! =)

this one's 4 Mon2. She'll love d monkey!

this one's 4 Siha, since she's always with medicines. :P

this one's 4 Reen. our beloved mom in d house.

this is 4 Siha!! ~always fashionable~

this one's 4 my sister..coz her bday's coming up! =)

I'll give dis 2 Farah bcoz of d funky look.

dis one I'll give Najah sbb slalu bersiap lama pagi2. Haha!!

handbags...erm...bagi tikah la! 

4 u tuan..hope u like it! 

This one's for Aina. Eat 'em like u eat ice-cream ya! XD

kak long, I know you love fruits! Especially banana!! ^^

No doubt, this is for him. =)

I love these biscuits. They're so nicely done that I don't have the heart 2 eat it. Hehe!!

Those tears flowed again

Today I stared at my laptop again. As I listen to this sad song words just came smoothly through my fingers. I've seen you cry many times before and yet this one was the one I can't bear. Why did those tears flow again after the happy moments you've had before? For once I thought you've found someone who could catch you every time you fall. Someone who could treat you like how you deserved to be treated. Someone who would wipe away your tears and replace them with happiness. I really thought you would finally be happy. But why did those tears flow again? It's painful to watch you cry. Even more painful that it's that person that's making you cry. 

I might feel hurt seeing you cry but God knows how YOU feel. I don't know what I'd do if I were in your shoes. Maybe I won't be as strong as you. If it was me I think I would have given up and stopped believing in all this ***** about love. But you were strong. You are still standing and moving on. Maybe that's why I didn't get the same test from God. He would've known I couldn't bear it. Although you're strong, it's still not easy to face it. I wish I could do something to bring that sadness away. That pain, that agony that's killing you inside. But I'm just a normal human being aite? It takes time to heal and I don't know how long will it take for this scar to heal. But just so you know, I'm here if you need someone to talk to. I'm here to listen to you. I'm here if you wanna do wacky things to let it out. Don't ever forget that you have all of us with you. We will always support you no matter what.

I know there's not much that we can do to help. But at least let us be there for you when you're sad. Don't cry by yourself. It'll hurt even more. All we can do now is pray for you. Maybe one day things will get better for all of us. Don't lose that faith..

Terbang tinggi

buat seketika terasa diri ini kecil berbanding kamu semua.

buat seketika, terasa seperti kita bagai langit dan bumi.

buat seketika, rasa cemburu menguasai diri ini.

kita pernah berpijak pada bumi yg sama,

bermimpi pada paksi yg sama,

tetapi hari ini kita berada di jalan berbeza.

aku melihat kamu semakin jauh..

terbang tinggi meninggalkan kami.

dan kamu sudah berubah..

sekarang,

kita bercakap pada laras yang berbeza,

melihat dunia dari pandangan yg berbeza,

dan kita berjalan juga pada langkah yg berbeza.

hari ini, aku masih tersenyum di sini

aku masih bisa ketawa

aku bisa menangis dan berlagu sepi.

tetapi hatiku bahagia

kerana aku redha dengan jalan ini

biarpun ia berbeza dari kemahuanku dulu

aku bangga

kerana utk berada di sini juga bukan mudah

walau kita punya takdir yg berbeza,

kita masih punya tanggungjawab yg sama

pergilah kamu ke sana

pergi melihat dunia orang,

dan pulanglah dengan kejayaan.

aku akan mendoakan kalian dari tempatku berdiri.

dan aku, aku masih bersujud syukur

kerana aku juga sedang terbang tinggi~

A letter from my heart

To you, my beloved friend.

Do you believe in fate? I do, cause I believe that we met each other because we're destined to. I think we've gone into dis conversation many times b4. It's hard to believe how we, from strangers can become best friends. I used to see you only from afar but now it's impossible not to see you when your bed is just above mine ;). We've learned to know each other's hearts and we've accepted who we are now. It's beautiful how we can't hide things from each other. I may lie to you and you may act like you believed my lie but in the end I'll find out that you knew I was lying. I dunno why I even try to lie to you when you know me too well. Hehe.. I love the fact that I can't lie to you. Funny thing is, every time I want to lie to you I will always forget that you'd knew if it was a lie. Then I end up saying the same thing, "I memang x blh tipu u kan?". Well, it's no fun when you can't lie but to be honest...I feel so grateful to have someone who knows me that well. Back in high school I remember keeping things to myself from my best friend and until the moment I opened my mouth she wouldn't know what happened. I kept the secret for a year and when I finally blurted it out both of us were crying. You see...that won't happen between us. When something is wrong with me, I don't even have to say anything! Y0u'd already know why I'm sad or not okay. Do you know how lucky I am to have you?

Some people say when a person is not expressive, you can't really tell what's going on in their mind. You won't know until they say it. But then again, since they're not expressive how can you expect them to say anything? Well, I have a friend who is not expressive and I do not find it hard to realise how much she loves me. Sometimes it's not words that tell how much one person loves us. It's d small things that they do. Like when you kept quiet every time I'm asleep. You were crying, needed a hug but bcoz I'm sleeping you stayed silent. Or when you were mad at me, you could have screamed to my face but you stayed silent bcoz you didn't wanna hurt me. Or the fact that you tried so hard to make my birthday wish come true although it's not easy.. These small things are the words that you utter silently to me although you didn't realise it. So don't ever think that I don't know how much you care about me.

I had this dream when I was sleeping next to you. You were walking, eyes fixed on the floors and you looked so sad at that time. Yet, you tried to show that you're strong. I dunno why everything was so emotional in my dream. I ran to you and hugged you. I told you that I love you and you hugged me back. I was crying and saying sorry. I knew I didn't do anything wrong to you at that time but I was saying sorry because I couldn't do anything to make you happy. I knew you were sad and I felt bad that I couldn't do anything to help ease your heart. Those tears felt real and I couldn't forget the feeling that I had at that time. I feel so sad and I wish I could bring your pain away but I couldn't. Then you said, "babe, you buat mcm ni mcm kite gaduh pulak". So I stopped hugging you. When I woke up, my heart was beating so fast. I saw your face and that's when I realised that I really love you so much. I syg gilak kat you babe..!

We've been through thick and thin. We've shared our tears, laughter and darkest secrets. After all that we've been ventured I just wanna thank you for always being there. I know in love and friendship we don't have to say sorry or thank you but I kinda disagree with that statement. I think that it is not wrong to want to appreciate your friend and say thank you. It's not wrong to feel bad that you did something wrong and say sorry. So here's a thank you from me for being a true friend to me. I've never thought I could be blessed with such beautiful friendship. And also an apology for the times when I hurt you or made you cry. I hate the fact that we always hurt the ones we love the most. I'm sorry for hurting you without even realising and cause you to cry. Just remember this one thing, I do not want anything else from you...I only want this friendship to blossom till the end of time. I love you babe =)

Winter Sonata Anime

After watching a few episodes of K-ON I find myself speaking Jap again. Then I realised how much I need to do the same for Korea. But honestly speaking, when I speak automatically it's always Korean dat comes 1st. 4 Jap I need to think b4 I speak. Anyway, I started to browse on Manhwa (Korean Animation) and found a great blog. As I was browsing through the blog I found 2 Manhwa's which I immediately search in YouTube. But I wasn't satisfied coz the Manhwa was 4 kids. So I googled 4 Manhwa pictures. Guess what I found? You've read d title of dis post, u should know already..

Winter Sonata animation!! Yeah, how cool is that? I watched the trailer in YouTube and think that it's awesome. Then I watched 1 episode. Haha. Believe me, for those who have passion in Winter Sonata, this anime is a MUST for all of you! As usual the graphics are not disappointing. The best part is they're using the real actor's voice! In Korea too! Dis is totally a bonus for me. I can watch anime in Korea. Haha!! Well, I need to coz now Korea is my 3rd language. Hehe.. :D I posted the trailer at my Facebook profile just now. Then I got the best comment ever from Ariffuddin. "I have the anime already~". I was like Kyaaaaaa~~~I want them!! Huhu so he promised to give me after Raya. Yeay~!! Lucky me! ^^  Alryte, let's juz enjoy some pictures k. See how nice they are k? Have fun~

Nomo kyupta~^^

YooJin shi..

Looking at her..romantic aite? (>.<)

Haha!! Their 1st meeting..

 

This one's cute. Later they kissed^^

It's a must to feel sad when you watch this anime

A picture that brings 1001 secrets from the past

Okay..that's all for now.. Find more on your own if you love them ya.. I'm looking forward to watch the anime after Raya! ^^

K-ON season 2

During our last semester break, I heard from 21 that K-ON season 2 was out. She has downloaded most of the episodes and was waiting for more to come. I was really excited to hear the news! We even got Yuki to watch the series. Heheh..thanx to theOtaku.com for the great wallpapers. Anyway, I just finished watching Iris at DramaCrazy.net yesterday. I was browsing thru other Korean series. I watched 'Personal Taste' since it was recommended to me but I couldn't watch the 2nd ep. Too bad.

That's when I flicked at the anime section of the web. I had no idea what to watch so I just browsed through. Then I saw 'K-ON season 2'! Yess! The perfect choice! Guess what happens next? Never-ending-rolling-on-the-floor-laughing! That's what happened! Haha ^^ No kidding peeps. Dats why I luv it so much. It's damn hillarious!

K-ON reminds me of how fun it is to have silly and crazy friends. Their life is so colourful. When they had field trip, other students were obediently sleeping but they were having pillow fights in their room! Then, when their sensei came in to shut them up, they end-up throwing a pillow right at her face. Haha (^^,) When she looks down, all the four girls are asleep! I thought that would be the last of it. But no, right after sawa-chan sensei went out, they switched on the light and continued their pillow fights. I've never had any pillow fights altho I've been to a few field trips myself.

Watching K-ON makes me wanna have more memorable memories with my friends. They seriously had so much fun together. Life was so carefree for them. I wish I could feel the same way about life. They are supposed to be seniors but they acted like twelve year olds. And the best part was, it didn't matter that they were childish. They were having FUN together!

That's a picture of Mugi-chan at the supermarket. She was so thrilled with the things that people can buy at the market. (she has never been to any market coz she comes from a rich family) I can understand why Mugi was excited but Yui and Ritsu was playing around and feeling joyous as if they have not been to a market as well! Yui wore a mechanic kind of uniform and said it could be good or their club's uniform! Seriously, they did so many cool things at the supermarket. 

Anyway, I have not finished watching the series. But so far, I'm not disappointed at all. To those who hasn't watched K-ON, you should see me and I'll give you the 1st season. Watch it, and you'll surely want to watch the 2nd season as well. Thanks to 21 I finally have a full anime in my laptop besides Death Note series. ^^ Hmm..I've not been so excited about anime for quite some time. I miss talking about anime. Whatever it is, do check this anime out ya! Da~

He's only 13...

I still remember how it felt when my mom broke the news that Abah got cancer. I dunno how to react and in just seconds I got advices from my best friend and teacher. I only told those who were really close with me at that time. They told me to be strong, and to pray for him. Somehow there are no soothing words to bring the pain away. Throughout the days when he was sick, my days were filled with pain and agony looking at him so helpless on the bed. I don't think I can ever face that kind of feeling anymore.

But yesterday my mom broke another news to me. My dear cousin, who is only 13 years old has just been confirmed to have leukemia. I was shocked and I'm still trying to digest the news. He will have his chemo therapy on Monday. I remember that my dad was so weak, he was given the lowest chemo. Not even 1% of the real chemo. And he became worse after that. Maybe it's coz his body couldn't take the medicine. I can't imagine how a 13 year old boy would have to face all that. He was such a good boy.. 

All I can do now is pray for him. I hope he stays strong. I'm gonna visit him tomorrow. Hopefully I can make him smile before his big day on Monday. Hakim, I'm sure Allah has His reasons for giving you this test. Be strong, and never lose faith. We will all support you. Get well soon and play with your brothers and sisters at home. I'm sure they miss you a lot.. 

You again

It's weird how much you affect me lately. Maybe it's bcoz I've been bottling up my anger to you. I can't even stand being in the same room with you. And your decision to come and watch me was totally a big mistake. I was already out of the mood at that time and seeing you made me explode. I seriously felt like there was a volcano inside of me. Then every single thing made me angry. Thank God you went out b4 our drama started. I felt relieved and was able to perform altho it was just a 3 minute drama.

That night I talked to my best friend. I told her how bad you have affected me. Up to the point that I don't want you to be in the same room with me. Yeah, it annoys me hearing your voice. I was close to crying that evening. I really didn't want you to watch the drama. Then I got the best advice ever. My best friend reminded me of how unimportant you are to me. So why let you ruin my life? It's not worth it. I was really depress because of you and I shouldn't be. You're just another insignificant person in my life. It's the same whether you're there or not coz I shouldn't give a damn about you.

After getting the advice I felt much better. I can talk to you. I can be in the same room with you. And I can be neutral to you. You're just like a stranger that walked pass me. I might feel angry that you were rude but it ends there. You're nothing to me. Get it? It feels good to be able to treat you like this. Hey, I still despise you. But you won't affect me. I think I can survive seeing you for another few months. But after that it's a bubbye~ wee!!

Motif sgt aku buat post pasal kau

I hate doing this especially since it's Ramadhan. But I hope this will be the 1st and the last that I'm writing about you. I'm sorry if after this you will frequently get annoyed by me. I no longer want to pretend being nice with you. If you wanna tell everyone about it, it's your choice. If people wanna label me for doing this, then there's nothing that I can do. They have all the right to do so. I have my own reasons for behaving like this and let it be to my own prior knowledge. 

Don't try to be nice to me. I might vomit.

Don't try to make me smile. I might laugh with sarcasm.

Don't try to come near me. You're gonna hate the -ve vibe I give.

Don't try talking about it to change things. Coz I know you CAN'T change.

After ten years maybe I'd laugh thinking of how immature I am this time. But let that happen. I don't need to feel guilty for disliking you. You think you're so good! Think back. For all you know that vanity that you have is the 1st thing that's destroying you. Who are you to look down on people? You think you're that great? You think you've never done any mistake? Puh-lease! 

Happy Friendship Day!

Happy Friendship Day everyone! In case you're wondering when is friendship day, it's actually on the 1st week of August. I always assume 1st August as Friendship day. It's easier dat way. Coincidentally, this year's 1st week of August IS on 1st August. Yeay~! 

Back then when I was in secondary school, we used to make Friendship Day a big celebration of the year. Everyone will be busy making greeting cards and by the end of the day everyone will have lots of cards on their table. (we like to display the colourful cards on our table in class) That was when we were in lower form. After form four we were too busy to make cards but we still wish everyone a happy friendship day. Being away from home makes u appreciate friends more. That's why we were so close. Friends were the ones we have at that time. At 1st you'll feel sad coz u're away from home but once you have friends, you are the happiest person.

Anyway, I'd like to say thanks to all my friends for being part of my life. Some of you wrecked my life and some made it so meaningful. But then again, if you didn't wreck my life then I wouldn't know how to appreciate life aite? So thanx also for being a jerk. I learn a lot from u guys. It's funny how your enemy can contribute so much to your life but that's what happened to me. Each person that I met shaped who I am today. For those who made it beautiful, thank you so much. Only God can repay your kindness. N for those who made it awful, thanks also for teaching me to grow up. I guess it is all part and parcel of life.

A special thanks to my 'tomato' friend. :) You taught me so many things that I never knew before. You were there when people looked down on me. You were there when everyone said bad things about me. N you were always there when I needed a friend. Thank you very much. I'm so thankful to have a best friend like you. I have weaknesses and sometimes I am not sensitive enough to you but you never treated me like an enemy. You accepted me and forgave my mistakes. I guess we really complement each other. When you feel sour, I gave you love. N when my life is too naive and full of good perceptions, you taught me to grow up. That's who we are. Tomato and cherry! If one day things change and we change...I just want you to know how much you've made a difference in my life. Love ya so much babe!

If I were to write a dedication to all my friends, this post is gonna be extremely long. So let's juz make it for one special friend okay? To the others, you've been a great friend too. I really wish I could thank each and every one of you personally. Happy Friendship Day everyone!! 

Embarrassing I tell you!

[Warning! This story is not suitable for children under 17 years old.]

Have you ever had the experience like 1 hour felt like 2 dreadful hours? And 5 minutes seem like too long to bear? I actually forgot how that feels in class because lately I've been having fun with the lecturers from my faculty. Yeah, there are a lot of boring subjects but usually I can stay awake. Last week, I missed one important class. Mr. Kieran's class. It was the first most important lesson and I couldn't make it. So I was like so scared to enter his class this week. What if he asks me about last week's lesson? I have no idea what they learned coz I dun have the RM98.00 book. Eventually, I came. I can't afford to skip classes coz it's a core subject and always known as killer subjects. That's phonetics and phonology.

honestly, with no books and preparation...it's really hard to stay focused in his class. My mistake, I know. I think I literally dozed off for more than 3 times. When he asked everyone to do the exercise in the book I will be blur again coz I dun have the book. Can you imagine how I felt in his class? I feel like hiding somewhere. Please, please don't look at me. Then the best thing happened. He finally said, "we call this a day" and he continued with "YEAY~!!!" Haha! He knew we were suffering. Then the next sentence was the best. "B4 we go, I would like you to continue what I did on the board. He walked straight to me and gave me a marker pen. At that time I was like, "OMG!"

I don't know a thing that he wrote on the board. Yeah, it's just IPA but I dunno how to describe them. I wasn't in class!! I had this blur and scared face and looked at my friends. They all flipped the book and tried to help me. I was taking too much time so I juz go to the board. I read my friend's lips and wrote it on the board. For the third description, I misread their lips and wrote 'SPREAD' on the board. Mr. Kieran was shocked! "Spread! But that's not even in the list!" It was actually FLAT. I rubbed the board, wrote the right answer and sat down. No one said anything to me. Maybe they knew I was so ashamed at that time. I couldn't stop laughing actually. That was like the stupidest moment I ever had in front of an audience.

That was certainly embarrassing. Here's another great news. We have a test on the subject next week. Yippedi~ I know nothing and I have to answer a test about it. Risiko utk fail sgt tinggi ye tuan2 dan puan2. I gotta ask someone to teach me Phonetics and Phonology.. I asked Zach but he didn't reply my message. Maybe he's too busy. LinO, can u help me?? Uhuhuhu... (T_T)

(T_T) They're different now..

What is 2PM without Jay?
What is Wonder Girls without Sun Mi?

There was one period when I stopped caring about Wonder Girls and JYP. I was so sad about Sun Mi and Jay. Then, when '2 different tears' were commercialized I started to find their updates. I guess I couldn't 'merajuk' that long with them. I luv them so much I couldn't ignore them. Especially when I've missed them so much. Last week I exchanged videos with 21. She gave me a lot of WG's live performance. Seeing them now feels like watching a different group. They're not WG anymore. I tried to heal myself by watching After School but I got more annoyed watching Caramel Orange. *caramel orange is the smaller portion of AS* Then I watched 2PM's new MVs. Again I felt the same. What's 2PM without Jay? Suddenly watching those 2 groups feels meaningless. And it's painful to feel that way.

Now I feel like I've lost WG and 2PM. Yeah, the two groups still exist. But they're different. I don't even know if they are WG and 2 PM now. Sigh~I hate changes.

Air mata kegembiraan

Honestly speaking, sy mmg bukan seorg yg mudah menangis. Xtaula kenapa dari kecik lg mmg susah nk ngs. Masa kat skolah, kwn sy ckp sy tabah. Sbb tu sy x ngs. Sy pun xtau nak iyakan ke nak nafikan. Tp sy tahu sy mmg susah nk menangis, especially depan org. Mungkin sy terlalu ego, sampai sy xnk tunjuk kat org betapa buruknya muka saya bila menangis. Tp yg pasti, bila air mata saya menitis, jgn diragui betapa dalamnya emosi saya masa tu. Dan selalunya hanya org yg bertuah je yg dpt tgk sy ngs. Org yg saya x malu bila dia nmpk sy ngs. Org yg btul2 rapat dgn saya.

Fikir2 balik, mmg iya sy mahal dgn air mata. Kalau kes tgk cite korea atau movie2 ni xbleh masuk list la. Yg tu mmg laju je air mata kuar. Kdg2 tgk iklan petronas pun blh menangis. Sy susah nk ngs when it comes to real life experience. Mcm dulu bila Abah sakit saya selalu tahan air mata dari jatuh. Tapi pd hari pengebumian arwah, x henti2 air mata jatuh. Terlalu lama agaknya saya simpan air mata tu. Akhirnya tumpah juga.

Kdg2 org menangis bkn sbb sedih, tp sbb terlalu gembira. Ni lagi la x penah experience. Tp, semenjak kenal dgn kwn baik sy yg sorg ni akhirnya saya tahu mcm mana rasanya ngs kerana terlalu gembira. Waktu tu kitorg dlm kereta, on the way pergi Pizza Hut. Dah sampai pun sbnrnye. Sekilas sy terpandang muka dia and nampak mata dia. Saya terkejut tapi buat bodo je. Pastu kitorg borak2 sementara tunggu pizza siap. Dia cerita something kat saya. Time tu saya tak dapat tahan perasaan saya and terus ckp something kat dia.

Mula2 biase je la. Tibe2 masuk ayat kedua suara saya dah serak. Air mata pun bergenang. Bila dia tgk saya mcm tu dia pun nangis skali. Sepanjang sy ckp ngn dia sy ngs. Sy x tahu dr mana air mata tu dtg tp hati sy mmg sebak sgt. Mesti korg nak tahu nape sy ngs kan?


Saya menangis sbb sy terlalu gembira dgn perubahan dia. Bila saya pandang mata dia saya nampak ada kelembutan dlm diri dia. Satu kelembutan yg sukar sy nampak dulu. Dulu bila saya pandang mata dia, saya nampak yg dia sgt terluka. Sy nmpk seorg gadis yg baru belasan tahun tapi dah terlalu banyak dilukakan. Setiap kali dia menangis dan mengadu pada saya, saya x menangis dgn dia tp dlm hati sy rasa sakit sgt. Sy sakit tgk dia sedih & sy sakit tgk dia x gembira. Jadi bila saya nampak dlm mata dia yg dulunya keras dah jadi lembut, sy x dpt tahan sebak n menangis kerana terlalu gembira.

Kami berdua menangis bersama hari tu. Bkn kerana kesedihan, tp krn terlalu gembira. Sy bersyukur sbb Tuhan dah makbulkan doa saya. Akhirnya, dia tahu apa rasanya dihargai dan disayangi oleh seseorang. Sy berterima kasih sgt dekat Mr. M sbb sembuhkan luka kwn baik sy ni. Tq Mr. M. Saya akan jadi guest list no.1 dlm wedding korg nanti. Doa saya sentiasa dgn korg. Semoga hbgn baik ni berkekalan smpai ke syurga nanti. Amin. :')

p/s: dekat dia jgk sy ngs 1st time sbb lelaki. Pelik, dgn dia byk benda yg saya rasa 4 d 1st time. :)