Expectations...let's not have it this time.

To tell you the truth, I'm not waiting for next week to come at all. It's very ironic because usually I can't wait for my birthday to come. Every year my birthday would be one of the best days in my life. This year, I hope the day wouldn't come. There are many reasons for me to feel that way and the biggest reason is because I know the day wouldn't be meaningful after all.

Why wouldn't it be meaningful? I can give you several reasons for that. One of them is because I don't wanna turn 18. Yeah, people....I don't wanna grow up. I love being the under-age girl all these while. Suddenly I'm growing up so soon. Sigh....I guess I'm not ready to be a young adult.

2nd is because it's fasting month. I couldn't go out and celebrate. No cakes, no party. Wow, I'm so spoiled huh? Actually I've not eaten a birthday cake for quite some time already. Being away from your family doesn't help you much. I've been in Labu for 5 years. What do you expect? Hehe. Nevertheless, I don't feel like it's a loss. Cakes are cakes even when it's not your birthday. It's just that surprises always make me feel good. Well who doesn't?

3rd is because my dad is not around. And I can only get a birthday message from my mom since it's a Thursday. Unless I decide to go back since I have no class on that day. I dunno. I'll have to wait and see.

4th reason is because my motivator wouldn't be there on that day. She'd be in Baling, Kedah. Uhuk! Observing practicum students...sigh.... Lecturers... Don't they have better timing? Why must it be on that week? Of all the days in a year, why the 1st week of September?? And it's for the whole week! It would be like a holiday. Oh, well...even if she's around what would I expect?

The conclusion is...? next week is just another ordinary week. Even though it's the 1st week of September. I don't wanna expect anything. Maybe having a low expectation is good after all? Who knows?

Movie Circle

Hello everyone....today I'm promoting to you guys about this week's event at faculty of education. We're having movie circle on 19th August 2009!! It will be held in the old library. There were 5 movies all together and we have done a voting session last week to decide which movie will be shown. The winner of the week is........"TAKEN".

Have no idea what's the movie about? Here's the full synopsis!

Retired CIA agent Bryan Mills (Liam Neeson) is picking out a karaoke machine for his seventeen year old daughter, Kim's (Maggie Grace), birthday. When Byran gets to Kim's house he give her the present, but is outstaged by Kim's step father, who gives her a horse.
After leaving the party, three of his friends arrive at his house for the steak party that was forgotten by Mills. Shortly after Bryan is asked to take on one more job where he is paid $2500 for four hours work, which he accepts. The job is security at a concert for one of his daughters favourite singers. When the concert ended Byran escorts the singer and manages to fend off an attacker. He then decides to have lunch with his daughter and his ex-wife Lenore (Famke Janssen), so that Kim and Lenore can persuade Bryan to sign a parental consent form allowing Kim to go to Paris with her 19-year-old friend, Amanda (Katie Cassidy). Bryan agrees on the condition that Kim calls him immediately once she lands. Meanwhile, Bryan's friend and former CIA colleague Sam (Leland Orser) convinces Bryan to take up a job with him: working as bodyguards for the famous singer Sheerah (Holly Valance).

When they arrive, Kim and Amanda meet Peter (Nicolas Giraud) who persuades the two to share a taxi. When they arrive where the girls are staying, he tells the girls that his friend is having a party and offers to pick them up, obtaining their apartment number and giving it to his colleagues.

While on the phone with Bryan, Kim witnesses Amanda being abducted. Bryan informs her that she will be taken as well, and gives her instructions. One of the kidnappers takes the phone and listens to a threat from Bryan before smashing the phone. Bryan made a recording of the call, and Sam analyzes it. Sam tells Bryan that the kidnappers are the Albanian Mafia, and they are part of a gang dealing largely in sex slaves. He contacts Lenore and Stuart, and travels immediately to Paris.

In Paris, Bryan tracks down Peter, who is hit by a bus after trying to escape, and then meets up with his old friend, Jean-Claude (Olivier Rabourdin). Bryan needs to know where the Albanians could be. Jean-Claude claims that there are many Albanians in Paris. Bryan then learns of an Albanian-run brothel at a nearby construction site. At the brothel Bryan is unable to find Kim or Amanda but instead rescues another girl who was in possession of Kim's jacket. After rescuing the girl, Bryan takes her to a hotel and meets up with another friend, Gilles, who is working as a hotel manager. Next day, the girl tells him that she had been given the jacket at a particular house where Kim and the gang may be. He follows the girl’s advice and finds the house. Bryan kills almost the entire gang after recognizing the voice from the phone call. Bryan searches the rooms of the house and finds many drugged, imprisoned sex slaves, including Kim's friend Amanda, who died from an apparent over-dose. He then tortures the surviving gang leader for information. The gang leader reveals that Kim was sold to a man named Patrice Saint-Clair (Gérard Watkins) before Bryan leaves him in an active electric chair. Bryan then appears at Jean-Claude's apartment and confronts him about his apparent dealings with the Albanian smugglers, threatening him by shooting his wife but not killing her. Bryan, posing as Jean-Claude, then goes to a party hosted by Saint-Clair

Bryan tracks down Kim just as she is being sold in a darkened room but is subdued before he can stage a rescue. After regaining consciousness and liberating himself from his captors, Bryan finds Saint-Clair and kills him, but not before finding out where Kim was taken. Bryan tracks down the yacht belonging to the Arab sheikh that bought Kim. Bryan boards the yacht and kills all the guards on board. He then kills the sheikh and frees his daughter. Bryan comforts Kim and takes her back to the United States. At the L.A. airport, Kim is reunited with Lenore and Stuart. A couple days later, Bryan takes his daughter Kim to Sheerah's house and she helps Kim improve her singing.

Fuh...that was long.aite? Dun worry the duration of the movie is only 93 minutes approximately. It'll end before 10.30 Insya Allah. Oh yeah, the movie starts at 8.00. You can buy some snacks and float before the movie starts.

-gambar hiasan semata-mata-

Interested to come? Buy your tickets!! Tickets are limited for 100 person only. Where can you get your tickets? Tickets will be sold at TESL square starting from today. Tickets are sold at RM2.00 only~ For enquiries, please call 012-9210243. See you there!!

I Fought It!

Hi everyone, I just wanna share with you guys about what I faced. I went back home yesterday. I was so happy to finally be at home, I've not been at home for almost 2 weeks because of SAF. My eldest sister was there at home too. Oh, she had a fever. I adviced her to eat 6 green apples per day. SIX??? Even one is hard to swallow, six??? But it was just a suggestion. Then, suddenly today I woke up with a dizzy head. BAM! I got the fever too! The message that woke me up from sleep was from Bibi, my roommate. She told me that Miss Shima, Miss Fatin and Miss Elia watched volley ball final game last night. It was between EDU and Sports Rec. I was like, "WHAT?????". Oh man, too bad I wasn't there too! Then another news hit me. Bibi told me to ask Miss Shima whether she's playing for the lecturer's event. I was crossing my finger and hopin that she wouldn't but deep inside I knew she would! ANd yeah, she is playing tonight! Oh God, I wanna be there and support her!!! Why does this fever come at this time??


So I fought hard. I dun want to be SICK. I ate my medicine, apples and sat in my sister's room without switching on the fan. It was darn HOT but I just distract myself by watching Hannah Montana. Finally, not long after that I was sweating! Haha!! ALhamdulillah... A step closer to be fine. All I know is I dun wanna be sick. I have tests and presentations next week. I can't afford to be sick. So here I am now, feeling fine. Just a LITTLE dizzy but I'm sure by tomorrow I'll be fine. I hafta start doing my slides and read-up on counselling and linguistics. Oh God, can the week got worse? Anyway, just wanna let you guys know that if you guys are sick, FIGHT! Jgn manjakan diri anda di atas katil. Insya Allah you'll be fine. N dun forget to take your medicine as well. Alright, gotta go. Have LOADS of stuffs to do. Da~

Emotional Roller coaster

What would you do when you know that there's nothing you can do? You can only watch and held back your feelings. Jealousy, missing someone and also a helpless feeling. You feel like you want to do something to change the situation but you can't. You want attention, you want to be loved but that seems like a big favour.

I dunno why I'm going thru all this emotional roller coaster. I know girls face this once every month but this is not the time when I have hormone instability. Then what is wrong with me?? At 1st I was happy, then I got emotional because of small things. It's triring. I don't like what I'm feeling. I wanna be the usual me, young and happy!

It seems like there's a black cloud following me this whole week. Whenever it's there I feel so gloomy. I'm waiting for it to go away. I miss feeling the sun's warmth on my cheek.

I think I need to be busy. Start doing LOTS of things so that I won't get emotional because of small things. Assignments, books.......HERE I COME!!!!

Emo Tuesday!

I'm pissed off! I need to say it out loud! HELP!!!!

The time will come when you feel that you have reached your limit and somehow nothing around you can cheer you up. That was how I felt just now. I was struggling with my emotion, trying hard not to say anything that would hurt people around me.

The thing is, I was mad with someone I'm close to. I could not confront my friend here because I dare not hurt her. Unfortunately, I was the one in pain. It was not a big deal but I really caould not take it at that time. I don't like talking behind her back, especially since I'm close with her so I could just close my mouth shut.

Luckily, at the end of the day I met my motivator and I managed to cool myself back. From being so emotional I laughed and smiled and get 'back to my normal self'. It was as if I was in battery low state and transformed to battery full state. Hish, funny way of describing my emotion!

Well, all in all I understood that sometimes when I'm not in the right mood all I have to do is cool myself down first. I've been in a bad mood since yesterday so when 'something' happened I could not help but to be emotional. A few of my friends realised my tight face and asked what was the matter. Tq 4 ur concerns, I really appreciate that! Even tho I couldn't tell them what was wrong, I appreciate the concern that they gave.

No more emo for tomorrow. I'm gonna start the day with a smile on my face. :D *wink*

Grateful again

I can still remember back then when I was still in Asasi, I wanted to take my degree in UM. I was torn whether to stay in UiTM or go to someplace else. As far as I knew, UM was the premier university that offered TESL in Malaysia. Somehow, they produce good graduates there. So I had a dream. I wanted to start fresh in UM. With people I don't know and new faces. I thought I could make it a challenge and see how my life would change. This new road would be challenging, I'm sure but that's just how life is. Life is about making choices. One decision can change our whole life.

But here I am today, breathing and living as a UiTM student. Somehow in the journey of choosing my path life, my mother gave me guidelines and reasons. Finally, my heart was set in UiTM. Today, I can not help but to feel grateful once again. This evening I received a phone call from my ex-roommate, Faizah. She is currently taking her degree in law in UM. I really missed her and that phone call really lifted my mood at that time. I was going to take a nap actually. Of course I'd ask her how's her life now in UM. It used to be the place that I wanna study at. Her answer gave me a shock. "aku menyesal masuk UM weh..."

At first I thought she was just joking around but what she told me later really made me feel sorry for her. I don't think I need to explain why she regretted her decision. I'm in no mood to spoil UM's reputation. But I can just say that today I am more thankful to be UiTM student and I won't stop praising Allah for that. Each day spent at the faculty with my friends, lecturers and megane-chan makes me happier and happier. Sometimes it's creepy. I dunno what might come after this that would make me sad. I believe life has its ups and downs. Now I'm happy but one day I'd be sad. I'm scared to face that day because what I'm experiencing now is so heaven-like.

Nevertheless, I will stay positive and enthusiastic. I still believe that life is to be enjoyed to the fullest. We only live once and we should live it to the fullest. No matter what would come tomorrow, I will be strong because I know how great my life had been all this while. Alhamdulillah...

Sweet two hours!

It is now 4a.m and I am still awake. Hehe! I'm at my cousin's house, surfing the net. I told you I'm a webaholic! I can surf the net all day and not even realise it's too late. But, no worries. I don't do it often. I don't have internet connection at home. Ok, back to the main story. It was already 12.00 a.m when I saw that my friend was on9 too. I chatted with her and wished her 'happy friendship day'. Our chatting continued till 2.30 a.m. It was a short two and a half hours chat but really sweet!

I gave her my blog link and she read it. At first I didn't mind then I started to feel......."segan"! Haha!! Then she said, "your writings are very sincere". Hearing it from her, I felt so encouraged to keep writing. Of course, it made me wonder which post was she talking about but it didn't matter. I will keep writing and just be myself. Sometimes I feel that my blog is not that good cause my friend's blogs are all very nice. Their personality is portrayed clearly through their writings. I dunno if mine's the same. But knowing that it is NOT THAT BAD makes me happy. Hee!

Throughout our conversation I managed to get to know her better. I discovered that she's really weird. No doubt. But, weird is not so accurate. The right term is 1-in-a-million. Yes! That's what she is! Have u ever heard of someone who dislikes durian but loves tempoyak? Or someone who dislikes 'jiwang-karat' but loves 'lagu jiwang'? I dunno what your perception might be but to me it's funny and it makes her unique. She is so unpredictable and full of surprises. Hehe! Am I giving her too many compliments? I hope not. Hee..




I managed to share with her what are my targets in life. And being supportive, she said good luck and knew I can do it. Again, hearing it from her makes it more meaningful. I know what I want to do in the future, so now I just have to work hard to fulfill it. I have 8 semesters to face. I hope I can make it. And I hope by the end of the semester I would still be enthusiastic like now. Young and happy! Hee!

At the end of our conversation I finally managed to tell her that she had been my motivator all this while. She was flattered, and more than happy to be my motivator. Hehe. I bet you guys know who I'm talking about? If yes, good. If no, don't ask me anything. Everyone has a good friend, aite? I'm just lucky that my friend here is also my motivator! *wink*